sunday was the day i told my parents about my boston plans. i wrote my daily checklist of things to do when i got to work. at the bottom - “5 PM BE STRONG YOU CAN DO IT YOU CAN DO IT”. i spent the day wandering around nervously. two of the kids i work with, aaron and alyssa, both were very patient and supportive. “it will be okay” “YOU CAN DO IT!” “what’s the worst that could happen?”
so 5 pm rolls around. i get out of the shower, go downstairs, travis is sitting with my parents. i feel a panic attack coming. my heart is beating so hard it hurt. i raise my hands up. “TRAVIS AND I HAVE SOMETHING WE WANT TO TELL YOU!”
i did not say much else for the rest of the conversation.
my father reacted how i expected him to. he had a very sour look on his face for a while. he challenged most of the reasons we wanted to go to boston. he then promptly got up and checked on the chicken he was baking. i think my mom was crying a little. travis and i left and i cried in the car.
today i told maria i planned on leaving at the end of the summer. i told her fifteen minutes before an important meeting i was giving for my department. she was floored. i hugged her and told her i loved her, and its okay if she’s mad at me.
this is the first time in a long time i have felt no burden on my back. i woke up today and felt free.